Maggie Road

One day, Homer came back home after work. Then, he met Dr. Gibert in the street:

--- Hey, Homer. I’ve got the results of your analysis. Your stomach is almost destroyed! I think you mustn’t drink more beer…--- said Gibert.
--- I’ll think about it, doctor. Thanks --- said Homer while he opened a beer.
--- Oh, and another thing. I’ve just passed by Evergreen Terrace. I think your house is burning, my friend… --- said Gibert.
--- I’ll think about it, doctor. Thanks --- said Homer being so quiet, and he went away.

“Stupid doctor….my house burning…jaja….what a stupid joke………………………….one moment………oh, MY GOD!!!!”

Then Homer did what everybody is thinking: he turned on the radio. And it sounds:
“Well, Michael. I think we should say to our listeners that beer is SO WONDERFUL…..but if you have stomach problems, you shouldn’t drink it in excess because…..”

And Homer shouts:
--- OH MY GOD!!!!! MY HOUSE IS BURNING!!!!!!!!!!!


Some minutes later, the Simpson family was outside home.
--- Everybody is alright? --- asked Homer.
--- Where is Maggie? --- asked Lisa.
Nobody knew it. On the floor there was a note. It said:

“Where nobody wants us”

--- Where nobody wants us….----thought Marge --- I think Maggie has been kidnapped!!!
--- Don’t worry, mum. We’’ll find her.--- said Lisa --- Let’s see…”Where nobody wants us”….What about under the bridge?? All the rovers are there…
--- Yes!! The Simpsons look for Maggie!! --- shout Homer.
--- Dad: this is not a TV movie….---said Bart.


--- Let’s see……..STUPID VAGRANTS OF SPRINGFIELD!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! --- shout Homer ---. I SPEAK TO YOU!!!
--- Dad!! Shut Up.

The rovers went next to Homer:
--- What do you want? --- as one of them.
--- I want to find my daughter Maggie. She is very tall, with dark hair and she walks on two legs… --- Homer said.
--- Homer, come on…. Excuse him, sir. Our daughter is very little, she doesn’t walk: she crawls --- said Marge.
--- We haven’t seen her, mistress --- said one of the rovers.

Homer felt a little bit disappointed:
--- Well, we can look for her in other place…
--- What about the rubbish dump? --- said Marge.

Bart looked to one of the rovers.
--- One moment…I know you! You’re Krusty!!

Krusty look around him. All the rovers look at him angry:
--- You said you hate Krusty! You’re a liar!! Let`s kill him!!!!

The Simpsons start to run, and the rovers start to hit Krusty…


They went to the rubbish dump. There, Bart started to look for someone in the midst of thrash. And a strange monster came out the rubbish. It has 8 eyes, 4 arms, 5 legs and it was purple.
--- I think……Maggie’s not there --- said Bart frightened.

The monster looked at them, and then smiled. He picked up a book from the floor and he showed to Homer.

--- A BOOK!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! EVERYBODY AT THE CAR!!!!!!!!!!! --- screamed Homer.


--- One moment….we’re idiots!!!! “Where nobody wants us”… It’s clear!! The nursing home!!!!!! --- said Bart.

The Simpsons went quickly to the home for aged. They went into running and they made Hans “Mole” fall down.

--- The New York Marathon has started?? --- he asked.

Simpson family went into Grandpa Simpson’s room. And there Maggie was playing with Grandpa’s false teeth.

--- Maggie!! --- they shouted.
--- Grandpa, why you have kidnapped Maggie??? –asked Bart.
--- Because you don’t know that I exist!!!! --- said Abe Simpson --- I had to kidnapped the child, because you never come to visit me…

--- Quick, Marge. I hit my father, you pick Maggie and we fly to Mexico!!


--- Come on, sirs…… we can do it properly….. there’s no need of blood!!! --- said Krusty.

He was hanging up from the bridge while the rovers looked at him with madness and they picked up their knives. One of the rovers, a guy with blonde hair was playing a guitar.

--- Oh my god…. Kurt, you’re my friend!!! Help me!!!!
Kurt looked at Krusty and laughed:

--- Sorry, my man. But I’m dead!! ♪♫Hey…….♪wait…….I’ve got a new complaint♫…..fooooorever in the debt with your priceless advice♪…………..♫♪

THE END


Dedicate to the memory of Kurt Cobain
(1967 – 1994)